yo
As a Videotheque employee, I do more than remember your account and shelve discs, I also like to bring you the news. This weekend, we have encountered to small tragedies. The first, the Wal-Mart heir John Walton died in a plane crash in one of his 12 planes. I don't want to make fun of the situation, because someone's trauma isn't my comedy, but you can stop worrying, Wal-Mart will continue their exploits. The second, the voice of Tigger, Paul Winchell also died this weekend. Animators and kids alike will miss him. And now please stop with the worried phone calls, ours is fine:
no one gets it:
Diary of a Mad Black Woman: That's what I called my autobiography. Isn't that funny, I should sue. No, this isn't Eddie Murphy and the Klumps, it's Oprah's boy-toy Tyler Perry. I don't know who he is either, but he's perry popular. He brings us his funny and lucrative alter ego-an elderly black woman- and his comedic stylings. I strongly encourage you to break out of your cultural shell and rent Boyz N tha Hood...or this one I guess.
Overnight: When you watch this, you'll think to yourself, "what a JACKASS!" and then wish and wish and wish that you were him. This is the story of Troy Duffy, bartender by day, screenwriter by night. The all-powerful Weinsteins bought his script, and soon thereafter dropped him like a bad habit. Like a nagging chain-smoking, talentless hack type of habit. He makes Gulager look like a genius. This fly-on-the-wall doc will make you laugh, cry and hate all at the same time.
other releases worth noting:
Gun (a mini-series about a )
Ren & Stimpy Season 3 and a halfish
Nick Frost's Danger! 50,000 volts! (BBC)
****************************
I fear having to end this this way, considering we have nothing terribly exciting, yet I must. Come by, pick up Bit Part (a videotheque zine) and then go home to melt.
au revoir!
www.vidtheque.com
Monday, June 27, 2005
Monday, June 20, 2005
06:21 (buy my buffy)
yo.
I can't believe on probably one of the biggest weeks of news, I was off somewhere fighting over some dude who wants me to buy his dvd collection. From Jacko getting off (ahem), to earthquakes, to Tom and Katie getting hitched and even Leo getting his faced ripped open, we were nowhere to be found. I know you come here for the laughs each and every week, but alas last week, I failed you. My sincerest apologies and I promise that when a hot story breaks, we'll be here to bring the funny. As a small side note, happy day of birth to the Captain who remains in our cerebral cortex each and every day:
go get em tiger!:
Coach Carter: The Captain and I were having a discussion on how this film reminds me tonsly of Lean on Me. He hadn't seen it, so to better visualize the scene for him, I reenacted the following scene: (something to the effect of) Mean, Cheating Schoolboard Woman Whom You Recognize From Carmen San Diego: "He is sucking our children's life away!" Burly, Proud and Going From Zero to Hero 3rd Year Student: "Suck on this bitch!" (grabs his chatanoogas). And Scene. And oh how we laughed. Unfortunately there is no chatanooga grabbing that I know of in Coach Carter, but it's aight, you gots BadAssMoFo Samuel L. Jackson in a role only Coolio was born to play.
Cursed: After watching director Wes Craven on the frustratingly addictive Project Greenlight, it made me wonder how he was so afraid to be associated with "Feast" and then drivels out this (un)watchable dreck. Save that's my onion opinion, but come on, if it walks like a shitty movie, it just might be one. I know I'm being mean, but here's a some good things about it: it's got Creature Editing 101; French Language Track(!); and it's copy protected! Wicked Awesome!
Hostage: I would hope that I am never a Bruce Willis character. That guy gets dragged through so much mud and dirt, yeck! And even worse yet, would be his family. Take the Die Hards for example, or Armageddon, the family's always at the whim of evil, and that sucks. Anyways, the title itself may just tell you about the entire plot, but hey give old Bruce a chance.
The Jacket: A titular piece of clothing provides means for time travel (wtf?). Well, I guess it can't be that outrageous if a fridge can do the same in "Primer." Still, a jacket? Admittedly, that would be pretty dope. I would use it to take myself back in time to change the moment when I first used the term,"pretty dope." And my guess is, Adrien Brody would go back to the night he gave it to Halle Berry.
*************
I know it ain't that great of a week, but it'll get better, I promise. Also, some very exciting news. VT has worked long and hard on their latest baby. We proudly present:
Bit Part (a videotheque zine)
Featuring commentary, lists, rants, observations, letters, images and text! Come by at the end of the week to grab yours. See what little we do with our time!
go out and picket at Santa Maria.
www.vidtheque.com
I can't believe on probably one of the biggest weeks of news, I was off somewhere fighting over some dude who wants me to buy his dvd collection. From Jacko getting off (ahem), to earthquakes, to Tom and Katie getting hitched and even Leo getting his faced ripped open, we were nowhere to be found. I know you come here for the laughs each and every week, but alas last week, I failed you. My sincerest apologies and I promise that when a hot story breaks, we'll be here to bring the funny. As a small side note, happy day of birth to the Captain who remains in our cerebral cortex each and every day:
go get em tiger!:
Coach Carter: The Captain and I were having a discussion on how this film reminds me tonsly of Lean on Me. He hadn't seen it, so to better visualize the scene for him, I reenacted the following scene: (something to the effect of) Mean, Cheating Schoolboard Woman Whom You Recognize From Carmen San Diego: "He is sucking our children's life away!" Burly, Proud and Going From Zero to Hero 3rd Year Student: "Suck on this bitch!" (grabs his chatanoogas). And Scene. And oh how we laughed. Unfortunately there is no chatanooga grabbing that I know of in Coach Carter, but it's aight, you gots BadAssMoFo Samuel L. Jackson in a role only Coolio was born to play.
Cursed: After watching director Wes Craven on the frustratingly addictive Project Greenlight, it made me wonder how he was so afraid to be associated with "Feast" and then drivels out this (un)watchable dreck. Save that's my onion opinion, but come on, if it walks like a shitty movie, it just might be one. I know I'm being mean, but here's a some good things about it: it's got Creature Editing 101; French Language Track(!); and it's copy protected! Wicked Awesome!
Hostage: I would hope that I am never a Bruce Willis character. That guy gets dragged through so much mud and dirt, yeck! And even worse yet, would be his family. Take the Die Hards for example, or Armageddon, the family's always at the whim of evil, and that sucks. Anyways, the title itself may just tell you about the entire plot, but hey give old Bruce a chance.
The Jacket: A titular piece of clothing provides means for time travel (wtf?). Well, I guess it can't be that outrageous if a fridge can do the same in "Primer." Still, a jacket? Admittedly, that would be pretty dope. I would use it to take myself back in time to change the moment when I first used the term,"pretty dope." And my guess is, Adrien Brody would go back to the night he gave it to Halle Berry.
*************
I know it ain't that great of a week, but it'll get better, I promise. Also, some very exciting news. VT has worked long and hard on their latest baby. We proudly present:
Bit Part (a videotheque zine)
Featuring commentary, lists, rants, observations, letters, images and text! Come by at the end of the week to grab yours. See what little we do with our time!
go out and picket at Santa Maria.
www.vidtheque.com
Monday, June 6, 2005
06:07 (carl sagan is a madman)
hey all
welcome back. Around this time of year, many a students are undergoing that very important change in their school career. They finish. To hell with it all I say, graduates from high school and universities all abound will descend upon our itty bitty video store, err international film archive, and ask that ubiquitous question--"are you hiring?" No, but we will always be glad to give you an application, if in return you give us a little dance. While I take a peak at the creme de la creme, here's your graduation present, sorry it's not a car:
pomp and circumstance:
The Agronomist: Free Huey this is not. Director Jonathon Demme interviews Jean Dominique--Hatian activist and occasional radio DJ--.over the course of several years chronicling the controversial, and at often times dangerous, moments in his life. Assassinated on April 3, 2000, Dominique never quelled his passion for human life. And here you are wasting your time reading this.
Be Cool: Chili Palmer returns with a vengeance. Only this time he's out to hit the music industry. Vince Vaughn (the hilarious) plays Raji, a sleazy music manager who likes to absorb all cultures, in particular the urban African-American one, and play the fool. Sound familiar (think hmm, Marshall Mathers). The follow-up to Get Shorty got 'cool' reviews, but glad to see they got Danny DeVito out of Puxatawny, Pennsylvania.
Beyond the Sea: On a cold night, say about 4 years ago, a young Kevin Spacey hosted Come Together: The Words and Music of John Lennon. That night, Mr. Spacey got on the mic and chewed out his version of Lennon's "Mind Games." Now, I'm no huge Lennon fan, more Vladmir than John, but at that moment I decided to end my singing career. Now he tackles Bobby Darin and all his glory. Damn you Mr. Spacey, damn you!!
The Machinist: Rather than plumping up like Bridget Jones, Christian Bale slimmed down to a mere 120 lbs. Most of which went straight to Zellweger's thighs. Ambient and creepy, Bale goes crazy with all those factory noises going around him, not to mention the dementia that comes about from hmm...NOT EATING!
Rock and Rule: You ask yourself, "My word, what in scalliwag might this celluloid epic be?" and I tell you it's an old animation in the style of Ralph Bakshi, featuring the wonderful voice talents of musical icons: Lou Reed, Debbie Harry, and Iggy Pop. So much for artistic integrity. No, I kid, I wanna be his dog too. Still I can't shake the feeling that someone, somewhere said that this would be awesome. I'm guessing the world just craved an animated Cheap Trick.
Seed of Chucky: Yes!
The Sopranos Season 5: It indeed has arrived, here for your loving. I won't say much, but I must say the cover I find very odd. Aside from it being very heroic, it stinks of Civil War photographer Matthew Brady. Also, seems like someone else is a little jealous of the Six Feet Under art direction and stealing the Gregory Crewdson photography concepts. But I digress, come get your fix.
****************************
New Staff Recs!
Mark: Foreign Film Fiesta: The title's the same, but the movies aren't. Recent adds are Mon Oncle, Show me Love, and Truffaut's Stolen Kisses.
Jules: Click it or Ticket: The recent PSAs circulating heavily have caught Julia's eye and gave her this month's pix. Try Ronin, Two Lane Blacktop and Cannonball. And remember, buckle up!
Paul: Overnight: The freaks come out at night. Ever have one of those nights you don't believe ever could've happened? Well, those nights, amongst other crazy improbable evenings are displayed here in thrid shelf from the top.
Andy: The Surplus Woman: No, it's not about Kirstie Alley, but rather a form of feminist doctrine. What is a surplus woman? Well, go read Gilbert and Gubar's The Madwoman in the Attic and see fawlty male rationalization at it's best.
Jessie: Out of Time: Wish you had more than 24 hrs, or a simple time machine? So does Jessie, and since she can't either she chooses to live vicariously through Time Bandits, Donnie Darko and let's not forget Bill & Ted.
Megs: Femal American Directors: If you can't figure it out by the name, I think you need to go work a Blockbuster. Megs scoured all of VTs inventory and found all things femal, all things american, and all things film and made a big recommended caserole. And that's a lot of cooking. C'mon try some, they are the better half.
ok! phew! I didn't think I'd make it through. I'm going to bed.
welcome back. Around this time of year, many a students are undergoing that very important change in their school career. They finish. To hell with it all I say, graduates from high school and universities all abound will descend upon our itty bitty video store, err international film archive, and ask that ubiquitous question--"are you hiring?" No, but we will always be glad to give you an application, if in return you give us a little dance. While I take a peak at the creme de la creme, here's your graduation present, sorry it's not a car:
pomp and circumstance:
The Agronomist: Free Huey this is not. Director Jonathon Demme interviews Jean Dominique--Hatian activist and occasional radio DJ--.over the course of several years chronicling the controversial, and at often times dangerous, moments in his life. Assassinated on April 3, 2000, Dominique never quelled his passion for human life. And here you are wasting your time reading this.
Be Cool: Chili Palmer returns with a vengeance. Only this time he's out to hit the music industry. Vince Vaughn (the hilarious) plays Raji, a sleazy music manager who likes to absorb all cultures, in particular the urban African-American one, and play the fool. Sound familiar (think hmm, Marshall Mathers). The follow-up to Get Shorty got 'cool' reviews, but glad to see they got Danny DeVito out of Puxatawny, Pennsylvania.
Beyond the Sea: On a cold night, say about 4 years ago, a young Kevin Spacey hosted Come Together: The Words and Music of John Lennon. That night, Mr. Spacey got on the mic and chewed out his version of Lennon's "Mind Games." Now, I'm no huge Lennon fan, more Vladmir than John, but at that moment I decided to end my singing career. Now he tackles Bobby Darin and all his glory. Damn you Mr. Spacey, damn you!!
The Machinist: Rather than plumping up like Bridget Jones, Christian Bale slimmed down to a mere 120 lbs. Most of which went straight to Zellweger's thighs. Ambient and creepy, Bale goes crazy with all those factory noises going around him, not to mention the dementia that comes about from hmm...NOT EATING!
Rock and Rule: You ask yourself, "My word, what in scalliwag might this celluloid epic be?" and I tell you it's an old animation in the style of Ralph Bakshi, featuring the wonderful voice talents of musical icons: Lou Reed, Debbie Harry, and Iggy Pop. So much for artistic integrity. No, I kid, I wanna be his dog too. Still I can't shake the feeling that someone, somewhere said that this would be awesome. I'm guessing the world just craved an animated Cheap Trick.
Seed of Chucky: Yes!
The Sopranos Season 5: It indeed has arrived, here for your loving. I won't say much, but I must say the cover I find very odd. Aside from it being very heroic, it stinks of Civil War photographer Matthew Brady. Also, seems like someone else is a little jealous of the Six Feet Under art direction and stealing the Gregory Crewdson photography concepts. But I digress, come get your fix.
****************************
New Staff Recs!
Mark: Foreign Film Fiesta: The title's the same, but the movies aren't. Recent adds are Mon Oncle, Show me Love, and Truffaut's Stolen Kisses.
Jules: Click it or Ticket: The recent PSAs circulating heavily have caught Julia's eye and gave her this month's pix. Try Ronin, Two Lane Blacktop and Cannonball. And remember, buckle up!
Paul: Overnight: The freaks come out at night. Ever have one of those nights you don't believe ever could've happened? Well, those nights, amongst other crazy improbable evenings are displayed here in thrid shelf from the top.
Andy: The Surplus Woman: No, it's not about Kirstie Alley, but rather a form of feminist doctrine. What is a surplus woman? Well, go read Gilbert and Gubar's The Madwoman in the Attic and see fawlty male rationalization at it's best.
Jessie: Out of Time: Wish you had more than 24 hrs, or a simple time machine? So does Jessie, and since she can't either she chooses to live vicariously through Time Bandits, Donnie Darko and let's not forget Bill & Ted.
Megs: Femal American Directors: If you can't figure it out by the name, I think you need to go work a Blockbuster. Megs scoured all of VTs inventory and found all things femal, all things american, and all things film and made a big recommended caserole. And that's a lot of cooking. C'mon try some, they are the better half.
ok! phew! I didn't think I'd make it through. I'm going to bed.
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