Hey'all As I stand here being hit by the Y2K, I can't help but laugh. Our computers are acting or reacting to our usage. They must be mad. And you too, must be a little upset, like Marty, over those dreadful, bald Oscars. Yes, yes, we all agree that they should give the man his due, but isn't it better observed when it's really warranted? Not that Clint's effort is much better, but hey, das my onion. After all, I did win the office pool. Now before you go and watch Goodfellas over and over again, read this first: Subterranean Oscar Blues: Easy: Yes she is. And she loves it. And I love it. But if you she only loved me. (tear drop).
Exorcist: The Beginning: The presumably crappier second version of this prequel is out quietly on DVD. The Paul Schrader version, is of course shelved for all damnation. (get it?) Having saved my mony mony cash flow, and missed it in the theater, I'm gonna say either of the two is going to happen: A) There'll be no green vomit (sadly) or B) a gratuitous amount of green vomit in combination with red, red blood. (eh). So whatever the case may be, all of you projectile, vomiting fetishists out there, brace yourself and get the mop ready.
Flight of the Phoenix: Coming in faster than my Mach 3 razor, this action-packed film is ready for take off. Dennis Quaid and others crash in the same desert where Pauly Shore landed, and groove to Outkast. Hey Ya! Oh-Oh! Do you hear that? It's James Stewart turning in his grave.
Incident at Loch Ness: Werner Herzog and Co. star in search of that ancient beast, Nessie! As a documentary crew tags along, we are taken along as things go this way and that way, all in the name of truth! Listen to Herzog's accent and don't blink, otherwise you'll miss the joke.
Spongebob Squarepants Movie: When this came in, these greedy clerks stole this away in hopes to quell their childhood dreams. Spongebob and Patrick are stepping out one their first feature length effort. Filled with more hip guest stars than P. Hilton, and a soundtrack that even the most ardent hipster would gobble, it's safe to say that Spongebob isn't just for kids. It's for maniacs too.
*********** Recs! Our recs have been visciously torn down in an effort to highlight this year's Oscar nominees. We have sanctioned off very sacred space on our shelves for the 5 best pix nods. In their shelf you will find a plethora of discs all related to those involved. So come look for those hidden gems that were directed by Taylor Hackford.
And sadly, that's it. I know it's been weak sauce these past few weeks, but don't worry, it can only get better. Maybe. get out!
www.vidtheque.com
Monday, February 28, 2005
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
02:22
Hey'all After the sudden demise of our planet earth, and the collapse of the blog systems (consider yourself lucky), I've put my life into perspective recently discovering my bad case of potential TMJ. According to several different accounts, my optic nerve will pop out, my shoulders and neck will disintegrate and lastly, my jaw will eat itself. Oh jeez, as you can see, my nerves are ever so jittery. While I revise my will, here's something for your cinemania: this week's slower than granny:
I heart Huckabees: For some unknown reason, I seem to be the sole consumer of this product who enjoys it. Given that, when I saw it in the theater, it was raining, I was cranky AND I was joined with a group of Cerebal Palsetic persons. Not kidding. It made my laighing heart flutter away. If existentialism, bad hair cuts and David O. Russell is your thing, and I know it is, than it's perfect. Pick up a copy of Blaise Pascal, kick back and enjoy a smart comedy for once. Recommended (regardless of the other Videothequers).
Nausicaa of the Valley & Porco Rosso: Gesundheit! Miyazaki returns by way of Disney with these earlier anime gems. Highly regarded as an anime genius in his native land, US audiences have only begun to admire. Oh man, I swear sometimes I am in the wrong business. Anyways, your kid sister named Noel will love this, so be nice and bring it home for her.
********** Oscar Buzz: Well since everyone's wondering who we're rooting for, including Jennie from the block, next week we'll have our homage to those shameful Acadmey Awards. Everyone's calling it an actual race this year. Whatever. So come on in and see what evil goodness we have displayed on our Royal Blue shelves. See?
that's it. get out.
www.vidtheque.com
I heart Huckabees: For some unknown reason, I seem to be the sole consumer of this product who enjoys it. Given that, when I saw it in the theater, it was raining, I was cranky AND I was joined with a group of Cerebal Palsetic persons. Not kidding. It made my laighing heart flutter away. If existentialism, bad hair cuts and David O. Russell is your thing, and I know it is, than it's perfect. Pick up a copy of Blaise Pascal, kick back and enjoy a smart comedy for once. Recommended (regardless of the other Videothequers).
Nausicaa of the Valley & Porco Rosso: Gesundheit! Miyazaki returns by way of Disney with these earlier anime gems. Highly regarded as an anime genius in his native land, US audiences have only begun to admire. Oh man, I swear sometimes I am in the wrong business. Anyways, your kid sister named Noel will love this, so be nice and bring it home for her.
********** Oscar Buzz: Well since everyone's wondering who we're rooting for, including Jennie from the block, next week we'll have our homage to those shameful Acadmey Awards. Everyone's calling it an actual race this year. Whatever. So come on in and see what evil goodness we have displayed on our Royal Blue shelves. See?
that's it. get out.
www.vidtheque.com
Monday, February 7, 2005
02:08 (Creative Drivel)
Hey'all Good News: I hear rain is on it's way, so you poets get ready to pencil in those thoughts. The water will land atop our heads and ruin many days, but you and I sh'ant worry, for the days that are numbered will soon expire. Not bad eh? Bad news: It may not hit us. Or so Dallas says. And because of that we have to stick to our normal routine. Also, the economy is getting tired and those who can't afford Coachella will sit at home or maybe catch one of those "concerts" at your local Regal Cinema. To each his own. Here's yours:
Bright Young Things: Based on Evelyn Waugh's Vile Bodies, this UK flick features those beautiful young things during the 1930s. No Great Depression there, but a little bit of snobbery. Or so I am projecting. But since I'm a pretty good judge of character, I don't think I'll be too far off. That Emily Mortimer is in this, and if you haven't seen Young Adam, don't, but she's in that too. With good teeth!
Deadwood Season 1: HBO is an unstoppable machine! Can nothing quell it's thirst? NO! Oh well, for those of you who don't have cable, HBO has graciously sent this one out just so you can catch up. From what I hear, they have a pretty good track record, ahem: Sex & the City, Six Feet Under, The Sopranos, Carnivale etc. Oh! And the lead actor just won a fabulous Golden Globe, so it must be damn good! And please rent this, or it'll just sit there like dead wood! HA! (thank Rick for that one)
Miami Vice Season 1: ooooh yeeeaaahh, Tubbs and Crockett are back! Put on your pink polo, roll up those sport-coat sleeves and hop into that hot convertable 'vette... we are going for a stroll! If you miss their badass live show at Universal Studios as much as I do, then this DVD is packed with too much vice! Me moms used to looove Crockett (the Don) when I was young. My elder siblings used to say he was my father, but alas he was not. Oh no, they used to say Tubbs was my daddy. Oh, the humiliation.
The Notebook: Conviently included with each DVD insert is a coupon for a $1 off a box of Kleenex. Hmm, is that a sign? The great Gena Rowlands stars an Alzheimer victim in love with Ryan Gosling. Set during those bad years in America, this love story transcends through decades. Be prepared to cash in on those coupons, and a carton of chunky monkey. Co-starring [Plastic] Rachel McAdams & James Garner. P.S.: Tell me if you like this plot: A romantic story about a late 30's divorced woman who gets to live her fairy tale when she is reunited with a high school sweetheart who had died previously and reincarnated in a mid 20's year old cutie. If only that were possible, Gena Rowlands wouldn't be making you cry so much. Also, tell if that sounds a tad bit like Birth? Well whatver dude, as long Topher Grace commits to his love scene.
Shark Tale: Dare I say it's racist? No. But many did critique it's generalization of peoples, such as Italians. But who cares, eh? I think these days we call it, "personification." Some people need to go back to school. Dreamworks' other animated film that is not that goddamn Shrek, did ok. As I'm sure many of you have seen Los Incredibles and have preffered the latter. But can't a vegetarian shark that is not in Finding Nemo get a break?
* * * * New Recs & Staff Recs! Do you love love? Welps, if you are feeling a tad bit romantic seven days from now, and want to surprise your hun with a gift from the Harry Winston of Video stores, come by a pick up our most romantic films ever! Handpicked by your favorite clerks, any one these will guarantee a special somethin somethin!! Try: Amelie, Pillow Talk, City Lights, or Punch-Drunk Love.
Are you feeling lonely? Well, get cosy with our Unhappy Valentine's Day selection. We've scoured our thirty x twenty video store and brought forth some of the most depressing, anti-love stories there are. Handpicked by your favorite, albeit sick, video clerks, any one of these will guarantee a special feeling called contempt! Try: Faces, Scenes From a Marriage, Hollywood Madame, and the all-time classic, Fatal Attraction.
Rick: Trash: No, he's not saying this films are trash, but rather they have trash in them! Who knows why the fascination with garbage, but come by and humor him. Featuring: The Garbage Pail Kids, sex lies & videotape, and Ratcatcher.
Meg: Righteous Puke Scenes: Love vomit? Meg does, so see her top ten that include that nasty substance supermodels love to show. I'm still unclear as to what makes it righteous, but hell, who cares? Try Jackass, Trainspotting or the queen of them all, The Exorcist.
Elise: The Slippery Slope: Faulty logic, one thing leads to another, the domino effect? It's all in here. Come see how when one thing goes, they all do. I think. Say: Touching the Void, Bird, Othello and Faust.
Andy: Meditations on Art (we'll miss you Susan Sontag): After the death of Ms. Sontag, Andy's obsequiously attempts to salute the late Susan Sontag. Featuring films that somehow discuss art in all it's forms, come see the idle chatter flurish. Try: Art:21, Basquiat, and the appropriate Mindwalk.
Mark: Dazzling Debuts: Mark is still in love with the firsts of many past and contemporary masters. Lucky start? Nah, see for yourself. 400 Blows, Badlands, and the grandaddy of em all, Citizen Kane. that should do it for us. Our catalog is getting bigger while the walls are getting smaller, so check in and find out.
Enjoy the evening and don't be afraid of the water.
www.vidtheque.com
Bright Young Things: Based on Evelyn Waugh's Vile Bodies, this UK flick features those beautiful young things during the 1930s. No Great Depression there, but a little bit of snobbery. Or so I am projecting. But since I'm a pretty good judge of character, I don't think I'll be too far off. That Emily Mortimer is in this, and if you haven't seen Young Adam, don't, but she's in that too. With good teeth!
Deadwood Season 1: HBO is an unstoppable machine! Can nothing quell it's thirst? NO! Oh well, for those of you who don't have cable, HBO has graciously sent this one out just so you can catch up. From what I hear, they have a pretty good track record, ahem: Sex & the City, Six Feet Under, The Sopranos, Carnivale etc. Oh! And the lead actor just won a fabulous Golden Globe, so it must be damn good! And please rent this, or it'll just sit there like dead wood! HA! (thank Rick for that one)
Miami Vice Season 1: ooooh yeeeaaahh, Tubbs and Crockett are back! Put on your pink polo, roll up those sport-coat sleeves and hop into that hot convertable 'vette... we are going for a stroll! If you miss their badass live show at Universal Studios as much as I do, then this DVD is packed with too much vice! Me moms used to looove Crockett (the Don) when I was young. My elder siblings used to say he was my father, but alas he was not. Oh no, they used to say Tubbs was my daddy. Oh, the humiliation.
The Notebook: Conviently included with each DVD insert is a coupon for a $1 off a box of Kleenex. Hmm, is that a sign? The great Gena Rowlands stars an Alzheimer victim in love with Ryan Gosling. Set during those bad years in America, this love story transcends through decades. Be prepared to cash in on those coupons, and a carton of chunky monkey. Co-starring [Plastic] Rachel McAdams & James Garner. P.S.: Tell me if you like this plot: A romantic story about a late 30's divorced woman who gets to live her fairy tale when she is reunited with a high school sweetheart who had died previously and reincarnated in a mid 20's year old cutie. If only that were possible, Gena Rowlands wouldn't be making you cry so much. Also, tell if that sounds a tad bit like Birth? Well whatver dude, as long Topher Grace commits to his love scene.
Shark Tale: Dare I say it's racist? No. But many did critique it's generalization of peoples, such as Italians. But who cares, eh? I think these days we call it, "personification." Some people need to go back to school. Dreamworks' other animated film that is not that goddamn Shrek, did ok. As I'm sure many of you have seen Los Incredibles and have preffered the latter. But can't a vegetarian shark that is not in Finding Nemo get a break?
* * * * New Recs & Staff Recs! Do you love love? Welps, if you are feeling a tad bit romantic seven days from now, and want to surprise your hun with a gift from the Harry Winston of Video stores, come by a pick up our most romantic films ever! Handpicked by your favorite clerks, any one these will guarantee a special somethin somethin!! Try: Amelie, Pillow Talk, City Lights, or Punch-Drunk Love.
Are you feeling lonely? Well, get cosy with our Unhappy Valentine's Day selection. We've scoured our thirty x twenty video store and brought forth some of the most depressing, anti-love stories there are. Handpicked by your favorite, albeit sick, video clerks, any one of these will guarantee a special feeling called contempt! Try: Faces, Scenes From a Marriage, Hollywood Madame, and the all-time classic, Fatal Attraction.
Rick: Trash: No, he's not saying this films are trash, but rather they have trash in them! Who knows why the fascination with garbage, but come by and humor him. Featuring: The Garbage Pail Kids, sex lies & videotape, and Ratcatcher.
Meg: Righteous Puke Scenes: Love vomit? Meg does, so see her top ten that include that nasty substance supermodels love to show. I'm still unclear as to what makes it righteous, but hell, who cares? Try Jackass, Trainspotting or the queen of them all, The Exorcist.
Elise: The Slippery Slope: Faulty logic, one thing leads to another, the domino effect? It's all in here. Come see how when one thing goes, they all do. I think. Say: Touching the Void, Bird, Othello and Faust.
Andy: Meditations on Art (we'll miss you Susan Sontag): After the death of Ms. Sontag, Andy's obsequiously attempts to salute the late Susan Sontag. Featuring films that somehow discuss art in all it's forms, come see the idle chatter flurish. Try: Art:21, Basquiat, and the appropriate Mindwalk.
Mark: Dazzling Debuts: Mark is still in love with the firsts of many past and contemporary masters. Lucky start? Nah, see for yourself. 400 Blows, Badlands, and the grandaddy of em all, Citizen Kane. that should do it for us. Our catalog is getting bigger while the walls are getting smaller, so check in and find out.
Enjoy the evening and don't be afraid of the water.
www.vidtheque.com
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