yo
As a Videotheque employee, I do more than remember your account and shelve discs, I also like to bring you the news. This weekend, we have encountered to small tragedies. The first, the Wal-Mart heir John Walton died in a plane crash in one of his 12 planes. I don't want to make fun of the situation, because someone's trauma isn't my comedy, but you can stop worrying, Wal-Mart will continue their exploits. The second, the voice of Tigger, Paul Winchell also died this weekend. Animators and kids alike will miss him. And now please stop with the worried phone calls, ours is fine:
no one gets it:
Diary of a Mad Black Woman: That's what I called my autobiography. Isn't that funny, I should sue. No, this isn't Eddie Murphy and the Klumps, it's Oprah's boy-toy Tyler Perry. I don't know who he is either, but he's perry popular. He brings us his funny and lucrative alter ego-an elderly black woman- and his comedic stylings. I strongly encourage you to break out of your cultural shell and rent Boyz N tha Hood...or this one I guess.
Overnight: When you watch this, you'll think to yourself, "what a JACKASS!" and then wish and wish and wish that you were him. This is the story of Troy Duffy, bartender by day, screenwriter by night. The all-powerful Weinsteins bought his script, and soon thereafter dropped him like a bad habit. Like a nagging chain-smoking, talentless hack type of habit. He makes Gulager look like a genius. This fly-on-the-wall doc will make you laugh, cry and hate all at the same time.
other releases worth noting:
Gun (a mini-series about a )
Ren & Stimpy Season 3 and a halfish
Nick Frost's Danger! 50,000 volts! (BBC)
****************************
I fear having to end this this way, considering we have nothing terribly exciting, yet I must. Come by, pick up Bit Part (a videotheque zine) and then go home to melt.
au revoir!
www.vidtheque.com
Monday, June 27, 2005
Monday, June 20, 2005
06:21 (buy my buffy)
yo.
I can't believe on probably one of the biggest weeks of news, I was off somewhere fighting over some dude who wants me to buy his dvd collection. From Jacko getting off (ahem), to earthquakes, to Tom and Katie getting hitched and even Leo getting his faced ripped open, we were nowhere to be found. I know you come here for the laughs each and every week, but alas last week, I failed you. My sincerest apologies and I promise that when a hot story breaks, we'll be here to bring the funny. As a small side note, happy day of birth to the Captain who remains in our cerebral cortex each and every day:
go get em tiger!:
Coach Carter: The Captain and I were having a discussion on how this film reminds me tonsly of Lean on Me. He hadn't seen it, so to better visualize the scene for him, I reenacted the following scene: (something to the effect of) Mean, Cheating Schoolboard Woman Whom You Recognize From Carmen San Diego: "He is sucking our children's life away!" Burly, Proud and Going From Zero to Hero 3rd Year Student: "Suck on this bitch!" (grabs his chatanoogas). And Scene. And oh how we laughed. Unfortunately there is no chatanooga grabbing that I know of in Coach Carter, but it's aight, you gots BadAssMoFo Samuel L. Jackson in a role only Coolio was born to play.
Cursed: After watching director Wes Craven on the frustratingly addictive Project Greenlight, it made me wonder how he was so afraid to be associated with "Feast" and then drivels out this (un)watchable dreck. Save that's my onion opinion, but come on, if it walks like a shitty movie, it just might be one. I know I'm being mean, but here's a some good things about it: it's got Creature Editing 101; French Language Track(!); and it's copy protected! Wicked Awesome!
Hostage: I would hope that I am never a Bruce Willis character. That guy gets dragged through so much mud and dirt, yeck! And even worse yet, would be his family. Take the Die Hards for example, or Armageddon, the family's always at the whim of evil, and that sucks. Anyways, the title itself may just tell you about the entire plot, but hey give old Bruce a chance.
The Jacket: A titular piece of clothing provides means for time travel (wtf?). Well, I guess it can't be that outrageous if a fridge can do the same in "Primer." Still, a jacket? Admittedly, that would be pretty dope. I would use it to take myself back in time to change the moment when I first used the term,"pretty dope." And my guess is, Adrien Brody would go back to the night he gave it to Halle Berry.
*************
I know it ain't that great of a week, but it'll get better, I promise. Also, some very exciting news. VT has worked long and hard on their latest baby. We proudly present:
Bit Part (a videotheque zine)
Featuring commentary, lists, rants, observations, letters, images and text! Come by at the end of the week to grab yours. See what little we do with our time!
go out and picket at Santa Maria.
www.vidtheque.com
I can't believe on probably one of the biggest weeks of news, I was off somewhere fighting over some dude who wants me to buy his dvd collection. From Jacko getting off (ahem), to earthquakes, to Tom and Katie getting hitched and even Leo getting his faced ripped open, we were nowhere to be found. I know you come here for the laughs each and every week, but alas last week, I failed you. My sincerest apologies and I promise that when a hot story breaks, we'll be here to bring the funny. As a small side note, happy day of birth to the Captain who remains in our cerebral cortex each and every day:
go get em tiger!:
Coach Carter: The Captain and I were having a discussion on how this film reminds me tonsly of Lean on Me. He hadn't seen it, so to better visualize the scene for him, I reenacted the following scene: (something to the effect of) Mean, Cheating Schoolboard Woman Whom You Recognize From Carmen San Diego: "He is sucking our children's life away!" Burly, Proud and Going From Zero to Hero 3rd Year Student: "Suck on this bitch!" (grabs his chatanoogas). And Scene. And oh how we laughed. Unfortunately there is no chatanooga grabbing that I know of in Coach Carter, but it's aight, you gots BadAssMoFo Samuel L. Jackson in a role only Coolio was born to play.
Cursed: After watching director Wes Craven on the frustratingly addictive Project Greenlight, it made me wonder how he was so afraid to be associated with "Feast" and then drivels out this (un)watchable dreck. Save that's my onion opinion, but come on, if it walks like a shitty movie, it just might be one. I know I'm being mean, but here's a some good things about it: it's got Creature Editing 101; French Language Track(!); and it's copy protected! Wicked Awesome!
Hostage: I would hope that I am never a Bruce Willis character. That guy gets dragged through so much mud and dirt, yeck! And even worse yet, would be his family. Take the Die Hards for example, or Armageddon, the family's always at the whim of evil, and that sucks. Anyways, the title itself may just tell you about the entire plot, but hey give old Bruce a chance.
The Jacket: A titular piece of clothing provides means for time travel (wtf?). Well, I guess it can't be that outrageous if a fridge can do the same in "Primer." Still, a jacket? Admittedly, that would be pretty dope. I would use it to take myself back in time to change the moment when I first used the term,"pretty dope." And my guess is, Adrien Brody would go back to the night he gave it to Halle Berry.
*************
I know it ain't that great of a week, but it'll get better, I promise. Also, some very exciting news. VT has worked long and hard on their latest baby. We proudly present:
Bit Part (a videotheque zine)
Featuring commentary, lists, rants, observations, letters, images and text! Come by at the end of the week to grab yours. See what little we do with our time!
go out and picket at Santa Maria.
www.vidtheque.com
Monday, June 6, 2005
06:07 (carl sagan is a madman)
hey all
welcome back. Around this time of year, many a students are undergoing that very important change in their school career. They finish. To hell with it all I say, graduates from high school and universities all abound will descend upon our itty bitty video store, err international film archive, and ask that ubiquitous question--"are you hiring?" No, but we will always be glad to give you an application, if in return you give us a little dance. While I take a peak at the creme de la creme, here's your graduation present, sorry it's not a car:
pomp and circumstance:
The Agronomist: Free Huey this is not. Director Jonathon Demme interviews Jean Dominique--Hatian activist and occasional radio DJ--.over the course of several years chronicling the controversial, and at often times dangerous, moments in his life. Assassinated on April 3, 2000, Dominique never quelled his passion for human life. And here you are wasting your time reading this.
Be Cool: Chili Palmer returns with a vengeance. Only this time he's out to hit the music industry. Vince Vaughn (the hilarious) plays Raji, a sleazy music manager who likes to absorb all cultures, in particular the urban African-American one, and play the fool. Sound familiar (think hmm, Marshall Mathers). The follow-up to Get Shorty got 'cool' reviews, but glad to see they got Danny DeVito out of Puxatawny, Pennsylvania.
Beyond the Sea: On a cold night, say about 4 years ago, a young Kevin Spacey hosted Come Together: The Words and Music of John Lennon. That night, Mr. Spacey got on the mic and chewed out his version of Lennon's "Mind Games." Now, I'm no huge Lennon fan, more Vladmir than John, but at that moment I decided to end my singing career. Now he tackles Bobby Darin and all his glory. Damn you Mr. Spacey, damn you!!
The Machinist: Rather than plumping up like Bridget Jones, Christian Bale slimmed down to a mere 120 lbs. Most of which went straight to Zellweger's thighs. Ambient and creepy, Bale goes crazy with all those factory noises going around him, not to mention the dementia that comes about from hmm...NOT EATING!
Rock and Rule: You ask yourself, "My word, what in scalliwag might this celluloid epic be?" and I tell you it's an old animation in the style of Ralph Bakshi, featuring the wonderful voice talents of musical icons: Lou Reed, Debbie Harry, and Iggy Pop. So much for artistic integrity. No, I kid, I wanna be his dog too. Still I can't shake the feeling that someone, somewhere said that this would be awesome. I'm guessing the world just craved an animated Cheap Trick.
Seed of Chucky: Yes!
The Sopranos Season 5: It indeed has arrived, here for your loving. I won't say much, but I must say the cover I find very odd. Aside from it being very heroic, it stinks of Civil War photographer Matthew Brady. Also, seems like someone else is a little jealous of the Six Feet Under art direction and stealing the Gregory Crewdson photography concepts. But I digress, come get your fix.
****************************
New Staff Recs!
Mark: Foreign Film Fiesta: The title's the same, but the movies aren't. Recent adds are Mon Oncle, Show me Love, and Truffaut's Stolen Kisses.
Jules: Click it or Ticket: The recent PSAs circulating heavily have caught Julia's eye and gave her this month's pix. Try Ronin, Two Lane Blacktop and Cannonball. And remember, buckle up!
Paul: Overnight: The freaks come out at night. Ever have one of those nights you don't believe ever could've happened? Well, those nights, amongst other crazy improbable evenings are displayed here in thrid shelf from the top.
Andy: The Surplus Woman: No, it's not about Kirstie Alley, but rather a form of feminist doctrine. What is a surplus woman? Well, go read Gilbert and Gubar's The Madwoman in the Attic and see fawlty male rationalization at it's best.
Jessie: Out of Time: Wish you had more than 24 hrs, or a simple time machine? So does Jessie, and since she can't either she chooses to live vicariously through Time Bandits, Donnie Darko and let's not forget Bill & Ted.
Megs: Femal American Directors: If you can't figure it out by the name, I think you need to go work a Blockbuster. Megs scoured all of VTs inventory and found all things femal, all things american, and all things film and made a big recommended caserole. And that's a lot of cooking. C'mon try some, they are the better half.
ok! phew! I didn't think I'd make it through. I'm going to bed.
welcome back. Around this time of year, many a students are undergoing that very important change in their school career. They finish. To hell with it all I say, graduates from high school and universities all abound will descend upon our itty bitty video store, err international film archive, and ask that ubiquitous question--"are you hiring?" No, but we will always be glad to give you an application, if in return you give us a little dance. While I take a peak at the creme de la creme, here's your graduation present, sorry it's not a car:
pomp and circumstance:
The Agronomist: Free Huey this is not. Director Jonathon Demme interviews Jean Dominique--Hatian activist and occasional radio DJ--.over the course of several years chronicling the controversial, and at often times dangerous, moments in his life. Assassinated on April 3, 2000, Dominique never quelled his passion for human life. And here you are wasting your time reading this.
Be Cool: Chili Palmer returns with a vengeance. Only this time he's out to hit the music industry. Vince Vaughn (the hilarious) plays Raji, a sleazy music manager who likes to absorb all cultures, in particular the urban African-American one, and play the fool. Sound familiar (think hmm, Marshall Mathers). The follow-up to Get Shorty got 'cool' reviews, but glad to see they got Danny DeVito out of Puxatawny, Pennsylvania.
Beyond the Sea: On a cold night, say about 4 years ago, a young Kevin Spacey hosted Come Together: The Words and Music of John Lennon. That night, Mr. Spacey got on the mic and chewed out his version of Lennon's "Mind Games." Now, I'm no huge Lennon fan, more Vladmir than John, but at that moment I decided to end my singing career. Now he tackles Bobby Darin and all his glory. Damn you Mr. Spacey, damn you!!
The Machinist: Rather than plumping up like Bridget Jones, Christian Bale slimmed down to a mere 120 lbs. Most of which went straight to Zellweger's thighs. Ambient and creepy, Bale goes crazy with all those factory noises going around him, not to mention the dementia that comes about from hmm...NOT EATING!
Rock and Rule: You ask yourself, "My word, what in scalliwag might this celluloid epic be?" and I tell you it's an old animation in the style of Ralph Bakshi, featuring the wonderful voice talents of musical icons: Lou Reed, Debbie Harry, and Iggy Pop. So much for artistic integrity. No, I kid, I wanna be his dog too. Still I can't shake the feeling that someone, somewhere said that this would be awesome. I'm guessing the world just craved an animated Cheap Trick.
Seed of Chucky: Yes!
The Sopranos Season 5: It indeed has arrived, here for your loving. I won't say much, but I must say the cover I find very odd. Aside from it being very heroic, it stinks of Civil War photographer Matthew Brady. Also, seems like someone else is a little jealous of the Six Feet Under art direction and stealing the Gregory Crewdson photography concepts. But I digress, come get your fix.
****************************
New Staff Recs!
Mark: Foreign Film Fiesta: The title's the same, but the movies aren't. Recent adds are Mon Oncle, Show me Love, and Truffaut's Stolen Kisses.
Jules: Click it or Ticket: The recent PSAs circulating heavily have caught Julia's eye and gave her this month's pix. Try Ronin, Two Lane Blacktop and Cannonball. And remember, buckle up!
Paul: Overnight: The freaks come out at night. Ever have one of those nights you don't believe ever could've happened? Well, those nights, amongst other crazy improbable evenings are displayed here in thrid shelf from the top.
Andy: The Surplus Woman: No, it's not about Kirstie Alley, but rather a form of feminist doctrine. What is a surplus woman? Well, go read Gilbert and Gubar's The Madwoman in the Attic and see fawlty male rationalization at it's best.
Jessie: Out of Time: Wish you had more than 24 hrs, or a simple time machine? So does Jessie, and since she can't either she chooses to live vicariously through Time Bandits, Donnie Darko and let's not forget Bill & Ted.
Megs: Femal American Directors: If you can't figure it out by the name, I think you need to go work a Blockbuster. Megs scoured all of VTs inventory and found all things femal, all things american, and all things film and made a big recommended caserole. And that's a lot of cooking. C'mon try some, they are the better half.
ok! phew! I didn't think I'd make it through. I'm going to bed.
Monday, May 30, 2005
05:31
hey all
so I can imagine you are reading this from the very comfort of your own home, maybe drinking a glass of wine or Naked Orange Juice, stereo in the background playing Vashti Bunyan's Just Another Diamond Day, and your shoes on the floor lying next to your Jack Russel Terrier. All the while a certain two, namely myself and Megs, starve our soul here at VT. Now if I were a veteran or my pops, I think I'd be offended and upset at not getting the chance to observe such a patriotic day. But alas, since I am not, and know not, I am forced to stand here in my new kicks, and give you the latest--and what appears to be the year's worst--releases. Not that I mind. I love you guys in this place, but one can't help being a bit deflated after seeing Tom, Dick, and Harry floundering in Garfield Park. Now while I pack up my things and get booted out for bitching, here's this weeks, uh, winners:
bring on the unemployment checks:
Boogeyman: It's a sad day in DVDland when I have to start these things off with the film, er movie, er whatever, Boogeyman. Following the shallow footsteps of studio moguls wanting to cash in on young naive moviegoers, this cashcow is full of shock/non-shock shockers and some good looking people. And I'm sad to report that their is not spike going through Paris in this one.
Home Movies Season Deux: From the genius mind of Brendon Small (I don't know who he is either, but someone here loves him) comes this second season of animated craziness. Based on the life of the real life Brendon Small, animation has never been more autobiographical.
Game Over: Kasparov & the Machine: Move over you pansy Bobby Fisher, Kasparov is in town. If you didn't get the reference I am talking about chess, a game I know nothing about but always pretend to know how to play. I've actually kicked some regal ass with mad skills. Anyways, Kasparov dares an IBM superton computer to whoop him in his game of choice. It's kinda how you play solitaire on a lazy Memorial Day, only without the strategy and intellect.
we also have about 1 thousand copies of My Brilliant Career. Come get on so we don't regret our purchase.
************************
I told you there's nothing. But don't worry! Next week we have tons and new staff recs! Lord knows how much you love those!
go out and take advantage of your day off. I know I would.
Monday, May 23, 2005
05:24 (nice cannes)
HeeHaw Summer is in full blaze these daze. I'm sweatin more than Condi at the War Commission Hearings. And trust me, that's bucket's full (eww). Despite the sun taking me for a piggy back, Cannes went well on it's way. I usually start these things with some ridiculous non-sequiter, but in light of such a cinematic occasion, I figured I'd be someone professional... Carrots are good, brocoli's better: where is my mind:
The Aviator: That's funny. Howard Hughes said the same thing before chewing on his ten inch finger nails. Leo the Lion stars as the said Hughes in Scorsese's big, gigantic, can't-get-any-bigger-unless-you're-james-cameron-or-ridley-scott EPIC. Featuring a gangbusters cast and a few Academy Awards attached to it's name. I can't say this one tickles my funny bone, but the rest of America and Videotheque certainly can dance atop the Howard Hughes beard. But before you wet your pants at the sound of Hughes' name, let's not forget to thank Mr. Clifford Irving such a delightful story.
Chappelle's Show Season 2: He's gone crazy. South Africa is quite a long way for spiritual healing. Don't you agree? You must admit the timing is questionable, sorta like how Paris Hilton's sex tape came out right before the Simple Life debut. He must be hitting that spiritual magic dust. Maybe his absence will make you appreciate his show more better. Ah hell, just pick up your bong and join the fun.
Fat Actress: I was going to call my reality show that, but Kirstie Alley said she'd eat me if I did. And since I didn't want to become caloric energy, I opted to call it: One Chunk of a Man. It's a dating show *wink wink* Anyways, I'm in no position to make fun of that women, Late Night does it for me, I am simply here to make fun of disabled Chinese dwarfs.
MPD Psycho: Mmm, I'd rather not.
16 Years of Alcohol: Shit! Who knew they made a movie about my dad. So that's what happened to him. Here I thought he was a war hero and died saving a village from Napalm and Jehovas, with only one leg and eye, crawling up & down the mountainous slope of Mt. Kilamanjaro without a translator! I guess my mom lied to me. Pass the scotch.
**********************
That's it. I know I've teased you before but I assure you that our very own zine is on it's way. Don't worry, I'll keep you informed of it's arrival once we get our heads off the bar. Until then, I bid thee a fair day! get off the internet now.
www.vidtheque.com
The Aviator: That's funny. Howard Hughes said the same thing before chewing on his ten inch finger nails. Leo the Lion stars as the said Hughes in Scorsese's big, gigantic, can't-get-any-bigger-unless-you're-james-cameron-or-ridley-scott EPIC. Featuring a gangbusters cast and a few Academy Awards attached to it's name. I can't say this one tickles my funny bone, but the rest of America and Videotheque certainly can dance atop the Howard Hughes beard. But before you wet your pants at the sound of Hughes' name, let's not forget to thank Mr. Clifford Irving such a delightful story.
Chappelle's Show Season 2: He's gone crazy. South Africa is quite a long way for spiritual healing. Don't you agree? You must admit the timing is questionable, sorta like how Paris Hilton's sex tape came out right before the Simple Life debut. He must be hitting that spiritual magic dust. Maybe his absence will make you appreciate his show more better. Ah hell, just pick up your bong and join the fun.
Fat Actress: I was going to call my reality show that, but Kirstie Alley said she'd eat me if I did. And since I didn't want to become caloric energy, I opted to call it: One Chunk of a Man. It's a dating show *wink wink* Anyways, I'm in no position to make fun of that women, Late Night does it for me, I am simply here to make fun of disabled Chinese dwarfs.
MPD Psycho: Mmm, I'd rather not.
16 Years of Alcohol: Shit! Who knew they made a movie about my dad. So that's what happened to him. Here I thought he was a war hero and died saving a village from Napalm and Jehovas, with only one leg and eye, crawling up & down the mountainous slope of Mt. Kilamanjaro without a translator! I guess my mom lied to me. Pass the scotch.
**********************
That's it. I know I've teased you before but I assure you that our very own zine is on it's way. Don't worry, I'll keep you informed of it's arrival once we get our heads off the bar. Until then, I bid thee a fair day! get off the internet now.
www.vidtheque.com
Monday, May 16, 2005
05:17
Hey dudes After a long, somewhat tiring weekend, I come to this computer to do my weekly drudge. Today it's seems a tad bit trivial, although I do enjoy doing these things. Over the past week, I lost a dear friend. Knowing that some of her friends are kind reader's of this humbled author's quips, my heart goes out to you. Now, onto the funny: oh boy, here it comes:
Kinsey: Sex. It's all you ever think about. Don't you have anything better to do? Yeah I don't either, but still I keep it to myself. Not that hornball Alfred Kinsey. He had to go around peeping into people's bedrooms, discovering everybody's nasty little secrets. He know's yours I bet. And recommends that you use cool whip instead.
Notre Musique: Legendary Jean-Luc Godard actually still makes movies. As to how good they are, is still left to be decided, but at least baby's still in the game. Taking the documentary to a critical format, Godard examines mankind's affinity to war through the ages. Using Dante as his structure his juxtaposition of images, speech and narrative to compile an interesting picture all his own. Here's what IMDB said: The structure is that of the Divina Commedia, with a rhetorical twist. "Death is the impossibility of possibility, or the possibility of impossibility. Thus, 'I is another.'" Or, as Godard explains, it's "champ contre champ," shot and reverse shot, a tacit equation (similarly, "writers don't know what they're talking about, men of action can't express themselves. Look at Mao."). Moreover, each section is described as a "royaume" (the title could be a reference to Rimbaud, "Savant music is lacking to our desire."). oh, I get it.
The Sea Inside: Don't let the Terry Shaivo case fool you. This controversy has been long abound. Euthanasia riles everybody's feathers. I'm thinking the Florida politicians, as well as those inhabiting the white house, didn't take a walk down to the cinema to check this one out. If it were up to me, it'd been homework. The awesome Javier Bardem, stars in Alejandro Amenbar's follow up to The Others. Winner of the 2004 Academy Award for Best Foreign Picture, it certainly will drop some tears slightly flutter your feathers.
Seinfeld Season 4: "It's a Nipple!"
Six Feet Under Season 3: Yes, Yes, Yes it's here. You can't stop salivating for the third season has finally arrived. Come get your fix of one HBO's better, less talked about productions. Featuring Gregory Crewdson photography!
Tarnation: Word of mouth gem, all done on one man's Imac. Jonathan Caouette's first feature mixes home movies, photos, psychedelic swirlies and text to tell of his relationship with his madre. Fascinating in seeing found footage and film functioning as psychotherapy. Now go make yours.
Team America: World Police: The puppets are alive!! Thanks to Trey Parker and Matt Stone, bitches from South Park. Hilarious in making fun of everything and everyone mixed up in the politco world. Puppet sex? Yup, it's there, safely restored for your viewing pleasure. This is funny. Recommended.
White Noise: aejsfdbn;fsvbn;dfvn;dufjvbn;sdfjvb;dsfivbdkfjvnbdsfvndofvnsd;pofnvdsf'ovsdnfdiubvd;oivna;dovbadsf;ovn dafovbasdfpvndf';idfnpasdbnvpasnvas;nvaposbas;osb;usdbf;dsuffnfnasdnvoirhsau ydgyasib;dbvd;fvb;uidb ;svb;asudvbsa;ua;o phew! I hear dead people.
other fine releases that I can't think of anything funny to say: Candide It's Easier for a Camel (Italy) The Green Butchers (Denmark) Bear Cub (Spain) My Mother Likes Women (Spain)
****************
Now that's all.
Pick up the new West Video Magazine (here, there, everywhere!) to see the debut of our badass commercial. It's worth it for that alone. (Trust me) now go on.
www.vidtheque.com
Kinsey: Sex. It's all you ever think about. Don't you have anything better to do? Yeah I don't either, but still I keep it to myself. Not that hornball Alfred Kinsey. He had to go around peeping into people's bedrooms, discovering everybody's nasty little secrets. He know's yours I bet. And recommends that you use cool whip instead.
Notre Musique: Legendary Jean-Luc Godard actually still makes movies. As to how good they are, is still left to be decided, but at least baby's still in the game. Taking the documentary to a critical format, Godard examines mankind's affinity to war through the ages. Using Dante as his structure his juxtaposition of images, speech and narrative to compile an interesting picture all his own. Here's what IMDB said: The structure is that of the Divina Commedia, with a rhetorical twist. "Death is the impossibility of possibility, or the possibility of impossibility. Thus, 'I is another.'" Or, as Godard explains, it's "champ contre champ," shot and reverse shot, a tacit equation (similarly, "writers don't know what they're talking about, men of action can't express themselves. Look at Mao."). Moreover, each section is described as a "royaume" (the title could be a reference to Rimbaud, "Savant music is lacking to our desire."). oh, I get it.
The Sea Inside: Don't let the Terry Shaivo case fool you. This controversy has been long abound. Euthanasia riles everybody's feathers. I'm thinking the Florida politicians, as well as those inhabiting the white house, didn't take a walk down to the cinema to check this one out. If it were up to me, it'd been homework. The awesome Javier Bardem, stars in Alejandro Amenbar's follow up to The Others. Winner of the 2004 Academy Award for Best Foreign Picture, it certainly will drop some tears slightly flutter your feathers.
Seinfeld Season 4: "It's a Nipple!"
Six Feet Under Season 3: Yes, Yes, Yes it's here. You can't stop salivating for the third season has finally arrived. Come get your fix of one HBO's better, less talked about productions. Featuring Gregory Crewdson photography!
Tarnation: Word of mouth gem, all done on one man's Imac. Jonathan Caouette's first feature mixes home movies, photos, psychedelic swirlies and text to tell of his relationship with his madre. Fascinating in seeing found footage and film functioning as psychotherapy. Now go make yours.
Team America: World Police: The puppets are alive!! Thanks to Trey Parker and Matt Stone, bitches from South Park. Hilarious in making fun of everything and everyone mixed up in the politco world. Puppet sex? Yup, it's there, safely restored for your viewing pleasure. This is funny. Recommended.
White Noise: aejsfdbn;fsvbn;dfvn;dufjvbn;sdfjvb;dsfivbdkfjvnbdsfvndofvnsd;pofnvdsf'ovsdnfdiubvd;oivna;dovbadsf;ovn dafovbasdfpvndf';idfnpasdbnvpasnvas;nvaposbas;osb;usdbf;dsuffnfnasdnvoirhsau ydgyasib;dbvd;fvb;uidb ;svb;asudvbsa;ua;o phew! I hear dead people.
other fine releases that I can't think of anything funny to say: Candide It's Easier for a Camel (Italy) The Green Butchers (Denmark) Bear Cub (Spain) My Mother Likes Women (Spain)
****************
Now that's all.
Pick up the new West Video Magazine (here, there, everywhere!) to see the debut of our badass commercial. It's worth it for that alone. (Trust me) now go on.
www.vidtheque.com
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
05:10 (obsequious banter)
hello I was sitting on my bed cutting itty bitty letters out of last September's Artforum, and realized that the American "people" have nothing interesting going on in their lives if they are as captivated by this American Idol/Paula Abdul 'scandal' as I think they are. Please. They should change the name of the show to American Idle. All I'm saying is the show sucks. Now, while I get thrashed and torn into equally itty bitty as my letters, here's a lot of other things to keep you away from channel eleven: completely, utterly terrible:
Alone in the Dark: See the above line.
Assault on Precinct 13: Knowing somewhat John Carpenter's personality, he must be steaming in his pants at the thought of remaking his 1976 version, not that it was an instant classic to being with. It's just that every interview I see with him, there are always to constants: 1) He always seems to be losing more and more hair and 2) He's always pissed off about something. Hmm, maybe it's related.
In Good Company: That used to be Videotheque's motto but we thought it to be sissy-like. So we went with "Videotheque: This ain't yo momma's sto!" And it has seem to work miracles. Topher seems to think so, he is always walking in here thinking about clever comebacks to throw at Ashton Kutcher. And then he goes on and on about how he made out with Scarlett Johansson. Pssh, I say, I got me Paul action last night. The Last Shot: More like Matthew Broderick's last shot at trumping his wife's success. Mean, patronizing, bitter? Yes, I'm all that but at least I can say kindly that I enjoy Alec Baldwin's work. So at least there's some salvation here. Although, you can't blame him for The Cat in the Hat. That was all Ron Howard.
The Life Aquatic: Hipster, geek and cinefiles alike scream with glee when you mention Wes Anderson's name. Bill Murray and a cast that rivals that of It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad Mad World, star in this Costeauian tale of love, redemption and pirates(?) I do agree with critics when they say they should give Bill Murray an oscar, I just don't think it's for this movie. But don't get me wrong, he's great. However, I am sad to report that both Pagoda and Luke Wilson are noticebly absent from this picture. and that makes me sad (cue 60s pop jingle).
Life and Death of Peter Sellers: This HBO production finally makes it's way outside the television box, only to be packaged and sent back into the box. Why oh Why do the Entertainment gods play with us!? Anyways, Geoff Rush stars as the titicular character setting comedic standards. Charles Theron co-stars as then-hottie, Britt Ekland amongst a smorgasbord of actors. Merchant of Venice: If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you rent us, are we not returned on time? Well 2 out of 3 ain't bad. Shakespeare's lesser produced plays made it out with mildy good reviews, despite it's controversy about race relations. Pacino's Shylock is to Shakespeare as to Keanu's Neo is to geeks. Amazing!
Sometimes in April: Fresh of the Rwandian Massacre, this Don Cheadleless HBO production recants yet another story during those tumultuous times. HBO, always willing to sacrifice dollars, pays homage as no other network could. Literally, the goddamn FCC will jump on your backs if you don't oblige. And we have only one woman to blame.
other fine releases: Jan Dara (Thailand) The Pornographer (France) Racing Stripes
************************************* New Staff Recs!
Paul: You're not paranoid if they're really out to get you: You guessed it! Paranoia isn't merely the cause of bad sleep and drugs, sometimes the loons are right. Featuring lots of people running, filled with action and more dramatic climaxes then a Russ Meyer flick! Featuring The Bourne Movies, Ipcress File and 3 days of the Condor.
Andy: La Comedia Del Arte: Pantaloons, Fools and Jesters all abound. Filled with curiouser curiouser clowns and artists, Andy's picks this month collects the best of the best circus circus.
Meg: Female Visionaries: Tired of the inherit sexism throught history? Well this bad-ass section is down your alley. Bring to lightcinema's least appreciated half of the sexes, Meg's section's got enough to make you reconsider film history.
Jessie: No regrets for our youth: Ah kids. Aren't they great? Well, these kids are discovering themselves as well as life. And sometimes it's not easy.
(man!) well that's it. go out and be merry
www.vidtheque.com
Alone in the Dark: See the above line.
Assault on Precinct 13: Knowing somewhat John Carpenter's personality, he must be steaming in his pants at the thought of remaking his 1976 version, not that it was an instant classic to being with. It's just that every interview I see with him, there are always to constants: 1) He always seems to be losing more and more hair and 2) He's always pissed off about something. Hmm, maybe it's related.
In Good Company: That used to be Videotheque's motto but we thought it to be sissy-like. So we went with "Videotheque: This ain't yo momma's sto!" And it has seem to work miracles. Topher seems to think so, he is always walking in here thinking about clever comebacks to throw at Ashton Kutcher. And then he goes on and on about how he made out with Scarlett Johansson. Pssh, I say, I got me Paul action last night. The Last Shot: More like Matthew Broderick's last shot at trumping his wife's success. Mean, patronizing, bitter? Yes, I'm all that but at least I can say kindly that I enjoy Alec Baldwin's work. So at least there's some salvation here. Although, you can't blame him for The Cat in the Hat. That was all Ron Howard.
The Life Aquatic: Hipster, geek and cinefiles alike scream with glee when you mention Wes Anderson's name. Bill Murray and a cast that rivals that of It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad Mad World, star in this Costeauian tale of love, redemption and pirates(?) I do agree with critics when they say they should give Bill Murray an oscar, I just don't think it's for this movie. But don't get me wrong, he's great. However, I am sad to report that both Pagoda and Luke Wilson are noticebly absent from this picture. and that makes me sad (cue 60s pop jingle).
Life and Death of Peter Sellers: This HBO production finally makes it's way outside the television box, only to be packaged and sent back into the box. Why oh Why do the Entertainment gods play with us!? Anyways, Geoff Rush stars as the titicular character setting comedic standards. Charles Theron co-stars as then-hottie, Britt Ekland amongst a smorgasbord of actors. Merchant of Venice: If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you rent us, are we not returned on time? Well 2 out of 3 ain't bad. Shakespeare's lesser produced plays made it out with mildy good reviews, despite it's controversy about race relations. Pacino's Shylock is to Shakespeare as to Keanu's Neo is to geeks. Amazing!
Sometimes in April: Fresh of the Rwandian Massacre, this Don Cheadleless HBO production recants yet another story during those tumultuous times. HBO, always willing to sacrifice dollars, pays homage as no other network could. Literally, the goddamn FCC will jump on your backs if you don't oblige. And we have only one woman to blame.
other fine releases: Jan Dara (Thailand) The Pornographer (France) Racing Stripes
************************************* New Staff Recs!
Paul: You're not paranoid if they're really out to get you: You guessed it! Paranoia isn't merely the cause of bad sleep and drugs, sometimes the loons are right. Featuring lots of people running, filled with action and more dramatic climaxes then a Russ Meyer flick! Featuring The Bourne Movies, Ipcress File and 3 days of the Condor.
Andy: La Comedia Del Arte: Pantaloons, Fools and Jesters all abound. Filled with curiouser curiouser clowns and artists, Andy's picks this month collects the best of the best circus circus.
Meg: Female Visionaries: Tired of the inherit sexism throught history? Well this bad-ass section is down your alley. Bring to lightcinema's least appreciated half of the sexes, Meg's section's got enough to make you reconsider film history.
Jessie: No regrets for our youth: Ah kids. Aren't they great? Well, these kids are discovering themselves as well as life. And sometimes it's not easy.
(man!) well that's it. go out and be merry
www.vidtheque.com
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